You all know that I will never fail to share with you things/people/blogs/stuff that I like to obsess over. Today’s object of my blog-reading-affection is the hair care blog, Chocolate Hair, Vanilla Care. The blog is authored by a lovely woman named Rory. She and her husband are parents to an adorable, three-year-old little girl whom they lovingly call, Boo. They adopted Boo when she was just a few days old and have given her the warm and loving home that every child is deserving of. The blog offers a front seat view on what trans-racial option looks like, with the focal point being how Rory learned to care for the hair of an African Amercian child. That’s a daunting task for any new mom, let alone one that may not have any point of reference on what natural hair looks and feels like, much less how to care for it.
When C.C. was around three or four months old, I began to search the net for tips on how to start caring for her hair. Sure, I’ve been combing my own hair for almost twenty years (gosh, I’m getting old!), but combing someone else’s is an entirely different story. I wanted to get a jump start on what I could expect, even moreso with me being on my own natural hair journey. Some people I know thought I was jumping the gun a bit, but I’m a firm believer that if you fail to plan, you plan to fail!
After doing some Google searching, I happened upon CHVC one night. I think what struck me about the site (and what continues to make it successful, in my opinion) is that Rory offers step by step instruction on how to braid, cornrow, wash, detangle,etc. her daughter’s hair. She offers tips and PICTURES of styles and maintenance, which is what I was craving. I wanted to see examples (ya’ll know how I feel about pictures!) and she presented exactly what I was looking for. I was thoroughly impressed.
To be completely honest, however, I was slightly disappointed that this new insanely helpful resource that I had literally been searching for, was done by a white woman. Not to mention, another leading blog/site on natural hair for children, Beads Braids and Beyond is also run by a white woman. I asked myself, “Why haven’t WE done this for ourselves?” But as quickly as that thought came, it left (I’m seriously talking a matter of minutes, here). I realized that none of that really mattered. Rory is a mom of a beautiful-brown-girl, to whom she wants to give the best care…just like me. That’s it. Black, white, whatever. It’s a mother’s love. Period.
Since then I have become a faithful reader of CHVC. The site is growing and I’m a full supporter and believer in her success! We’ve chatted online a bit and I find her to be incredibly sweet and hope to meet her one day (she lives in California, too).
For your clicking pleasure, here are some more links that will help you get to know more about Rory, Boo, and the blog!
Feature Black Girl Long Hair: White Mother’s Opinion on Touching Daughter’s Natural Hair – This post has garnered a whopping 294 comments! The subject matter of hair touching (in this case, Rory’s open letter about it) sparked a huge debate. Most of the comments are supportive, but there are a bunch that are mean and plain old nasty, which I find unfortunate. I wish people can get beyond the color issue (like I did) and appreciate her efforts to be a good mom, instead of tearing her down. SMH!
Please make sure to check the site out and show her some love!
So much of who we are as Brown women and how we’re seen, is tied to our hair. As moms we have so many things we want to teach our children, such as manners, the importance of an education, and respecting others. One thing I desire to teach my daughter is how to embrace and love her natural hair.
Right now, natural hair is an exciting topic among brown women everywhere. The term natural is defined by most as hair that has not been chemically altered, but worn in its natural state.
I’ve been relaxer free for ten years, but a press-n-curl was my primary styling choice. I recently made the decision to embrace my natural curls and back away from the hot comb! I have had so much fun getting to know my hair! I love the versatility of being able to wear a bun, a puff, or twist out. The options are endless!
What I love most about being natural is this…I’ll be able to teach my baby girl how to love all of who she is, from the top of her head to the bottom of her cute little feet. She’s eight months old now and I love having her sit in the bathroom with me while I condition and twist my tresses. I want her to grow up seeing me wear my hair in a variety of different styles while, most importantly, taking care of my hair. I hope to teach her not only to care for her hair, but to love her whole self as a natural, beautiful, brown girl!
How does hair play a role in your relationship with your children?
*Note: This post was originally ran on the lovely e-magazine, Beautiful Brown Girls that I’m a guest blogger for, on 8/24/11. Visit the site and show them some love!